There Have Been

Bad Moments


April's Fault
with all due respect for your lectures on the peanut...
4-6

The other morning while trying to cool down a bottle for Curren, I began the daily process of trying to find the remote control among the couch cushions. Of course I could have just punched a button on the front of the TV to activate it, but that's simply not the way my mind works anymore.
 
Sometimes being a child of the information age catches you with your animal instincts down around your ankles.
 
Once I located the remote control, I thumbed the button to turn on the set. No response. Undaunted, I pressed the switch again, this time pushing much harder than I had the first time. Finally, the set jumped to life. I had to hold the remote at an angle and move it around just to get the volume right, and I literally had to stand right up in front of the screen in order to change the channels.
 
After a while this got frustrating, so I flipped the remote over and popped the batteries out. I juggled them around in my fingers, put them back in, and continued the process of searching for the channel I wanted.
  
The remote was much more responsive this time.
 
Between a users conference for work that put me in Orlando for three days, and an unexpected stay over in Tallahassee with my sister-in-law, I hadn't been home in a week. Everything in the apartment felt a little off, like the way things don't feel quite right on that first morning after the switch to daylight savings time. I was in the right place, doing the right things, but somehow everything felt like it was taking much longer than it needed to. It was almost as if I was the remote control, and someone was pushing into my buttons really hard, trying to milk that last bit of power out of me.
 
After Curren drank his bottle down, I set him loose in his playpen with a couple of crackers to gnaw on, and I headed back into the kitchen to make myself some coffee. Yawning cats rubbed up against my leg as I checked the fridge. I wasn't looking for anything specific, it's just one of those morning rituals I have. I open up the door, feel the cold air against my face, and look around for a few seconds. If I see something good I might grab it, or I might just store it into some memory cell for later. I don't know -- it's just something I've done for so long that I don't exactly remember why I started doing it.
 
From the ground came was a complaining meow, followed by another insistent rub against my leg. I poured some half-and-half into a dish, made myself a cup of joe, and stared out the window for a while.
 
So many things I said I would do. So many things that I think I know. So many questions unanswered..
 
I sipped my coffee while I checked on the kid, who had fallen back asleep. It was too early for cartoons, and the television newscasters seemed to be talking in whispers. I thought for a moment about checking email, noodling around on the acoustic guitar, maybe doing a little reading. Nothing tasted good in my mind. I just kept thinking about the remote control.
 
The warmth of the sun didn't seem to be able to break through the windows of my apartment this morning, only dust-filled beams of light snaked through the edges of the vertical blinds. I cupped my mug in both hands to feel it's warmth move through me, while I looked at the sun-made tiger stripes on the carpet. From this distance, they looked like cell bars. It occurred to be that I hadn't been in this room in days. I suddenly realized that I didn't want to be inside today at all. Maybe I could take the kid to the beach or something, but sitting between these walls was simply not an option. Somehow these walls were holding me in, keeping me fat, making my hair fall out.
 
Maybe it was the fact that I hadn't really taken advantage of the opportunities to relax that had been offered to me at the users conference. Maybe it was the fact that Tallahassee seemed so inviting in it's calmness this time around. I'm not sure. All I knew was that my plan, whatever it was supposed to be, was not working.
 
I took down the remaining coffee in my mug and headed back into the kitchen for a refill. It was, I decided, April's fault. Somehow April was the month that I noticed time going by. Somehow April was where I found myself again, feeling much the same as I had an April before.
 
See, if I were to ask you what you were doing one year ago today, it's very likely that you won't be able to remember it exactly. I think that's where a lot of us live, knowing time is moving, but not always able to gauge just how fast. But here, at the end of March and the beginning of April was always something for me to look back on, some landmark that stood out clearly from everything else...
 
Last April I was best man at my brother's wedding. Kim was a few months pregnant, but we were both excited about the child we were soon to meet. I was having difficulty with some of my bosses at the school, but at the time it was simply a matter of them not seeing the method to my madness. I was a good teacher, and even if it took a little friction along the way my boss would eventually see that. I had survived two executive directors before this new moron, and I would survive this as well. Simply put, They weren't going to fire me.
 
I was in one of those rare grooves where the answers came along with the questions, the sun didn't get in my eyes, and nothing was going to fall apart. I was feeling it, and I shined throughout my brother's wedding with a confidence that radiated everywhere I went.
 
I look back at that time just a year ago, and I realize just how different things have become now. It seems that there was a time when I was able to get myself into a groove and push it along like a champ, but then for whatever reason the batteries would always start to fade. But instead of recharging myself, I just start to push the buttons harder, try to force things....
 
How many different jobs in how many years? How many career tracks in how many years? How many good things have soured up and left me looking for a new way out? How many times have I started over?
 
What it comes down to is that one year ago I had no idea that it could fall apart again. And when it did, I was so shocked that it's made me more hesitant than ever. My perspectives have changed. It's like I feel the time that's gone by, and not the time ahead. I see what I've missed, not what I have before me. I see what I have to do for Kim and Curren, not how Kim and Curren make me feel. Other people see it, but somehow I've made myself blind to it.
 
Later that afternoon while Kim was at her driving class, I packed a bunch of things into a duffel bag, put Curren into the car seat, and drove him out to the beach. We played in a tide pool for a couple of hours, and I watched him clench his toes in the sand, pick up shells, and splash the sea water. I watched him smile. I felt the sunlight against my shoulders.
 

I got my feet wet.



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